Aubrey Plaza says grief is a 'giant ocean of awfulness'

At a glance
Aubrey Plaza speaks publicly for the first time since Jeff Baena's suicide seven months ago
The actress married the film-maker in 2021 and they separated in 2024
Plaza likens grief to a mysterious deep chasm from a recent film
- Published
Actress Aubrey Plaza has said life is "a daily struggle", seven months after her estranged husband, film-maker Jeff Baena, took his own life.
The writer, director and producer died in January at the age of 47.
Plaza spoke about the aftermath for the first time in an interview on her former Parks and Recreation co-star Amy Poehler's podcast.
Asked how she was feeling, Plaza said "I think I'm OK" before likening grief to a "giant ocean of awfulness".
"Sometimes I just want to dive into it and just like be in it," she said. "Then sometimes I just look at it, and sometimes I try to get away from it. But, it's always there."
Plaza and Baena got married in 2021 after working on films including 2014 horror Life After Beth and 2017 historical comedy The Little Hours.
He was found dead at his Los Angeles home in early January.

Aubrey Plaza and Jeff Baena got married in 2021 and separated in 2024
At the start of their interview on the Good Hang podcast, Poehler asked Plaza how she was.
"Right in this very, very present moment, I feel happy to be with you," she replied.
"Overall, I'm here and I'm functioning. I feel really grateful to be moving through the world. I think I'm OK, but it's like a daily struggle, obviously."
The 41-year-old US actress went on to talk about 2025 movie The Gorge to describe her grief.
That film stars Miles Teller and Anya Taylor-Joy as two snipers guarding opposite sides of a mysterious deep chasm.
"This is a really dumb analogy and it was kind of a joke at a certain point, but I actually mean it. Did you see that movie The Gorge?" Plaza said.
"In the movie, there's a cliff on one side and there's a cliff on the other side, then there's a gorge in between and it's filled with all these monster people that are trying to get them.
"I swear when I watched it I was like, that feels like what my grief is like, or what grief could be like. At all times, there's like a giant ocean of just awfulness that's right there."
The couple separated in September 2024, according to the Los Angeles County Coroner Investigator.
Plaza has also starred in TV's The White Lotus and Marvel series Agatha All Along, and was speaking to promote her new film Honey Don't!
Baena was best known for writing films like 2004's I Heart Huckabees, and for writing and directing 2016's Joshy, 2017's The Little Hours and 2020's Horse Girl.
BBC News used AI to help write the summary at the top of this article. It was edited by BBC journalists. Find out more.
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