Friends launch group to give dads a place to talk

(From left) Wayne Collins, Ben Price, Max Morton and Alex Thomas set up the group after a chat while watching football

Isolation, exhaustion and working out exactly how to navigate the first months of a baby's life are topics all new parents are faced with.

But while maternal mental health has become more widely spoken about in recent years, some fathers say they feel left out of the picture.

Four dads from Frome in Somerset who were experiencing these feelings decided to band together to do something about it and offer support to others.

Their group, For Dads Sake (FDS) may only be a few months old, but dozens of men in the town who had been searching for a place to talk all things fatherhood have already joined.

More than 40 men have now joined the group

Ben Price, 31, is one of the group's founders. "Dad chat just seeps into conversations constantly," he said.

"You're unloading about the colour of your child's poo, or what they ate, what they didn't eat, and not everyone really wants to chat about that.

"We thought it'd be really good to get a few people together and just go deep into the dad conversation, and then the next time we're down the pub we can chat about the latest thing we've watched on Netflix or something."

The idea for FDS was sparked when the four founding members, Mr Price, Max Morton, 41, Wayne Collins, 36, and Alex Thomas, 31, started meeting regularly to watch Frome Town FC at the start of the year.

With all of them having young children, they soon found that many of their conversations began to revolve around fatherhood - not just sleep schedules or toothbrushing tactics - but mental health and some of parenting's bigger questions.

"The more we've been speaking to dads, the more we've realised that actually, there isn't that much support for dads to ask the questions that we might have," said Mr Morton.

"It's always the dads asking the mums 'what do we do here?, and then it feels like we're not doing a very good job because we're not finding the answers out [ourselves]," he added.

"But this group [means] we can get advice from different people with kids of different ages... and we can bring information ourselves, which I think is quite powerful."

Mr Morton (second right) described the group as "life changing"

"Having that support network of other dads who are going through the same thing [is great] because men are our own little islands and sometimes it's nice to build a little bridge and connect those islands up together," Mr Thomas said.

While none of the founders are trained in mental health care, they were clear that one of the main reasons for regularly getting together a group of dads to chat about parenting was to signpost people who might be struggling to the right services.

'In the background'

Mr Collins said he "really struggled" when his son was born because "there was no one really to talk to".

"We'd go to all the check-ups and, rightly so, it's all about the mums - which it should be because they've had massive changes - but I found you'd be sat there sort of in the background.

"There almost needs to be like a check-up for dads a month or two in to make sure you're okay as well."

But while that support isn't readily available, the four dads hope FDS can ease some of the pressure.

There have only been two meet-ups so far, but already there are already 40 members and more men joining all the time.

While recent plans have revolved around the pub, the group hopes to expand to coffee mornings, park runs and even family fun days.

"It's been life changing, really, because I'm able to be Max and dad simultaneously," said Mr Morton.

"I think that's really, really important."