'Scotland qualifying for the World Cup put me in hospital'

Colin Paterson wearing the offending badge the day of Scotland's qualifying match against Denmark

It is the kind of classic pub chat I have been a part of before Scotland games in countries all around the globe, including Lichtenstein, Mexico and Kazakhstan.

"Would you give up a finger if it meant Scotland qualified for the World Cup?"

For me, this almost became a reality.

I have been in love with the Scottish football team for more than 40 years.

The national side was always the one that mattered to my family, rather than any club, due to generational pride in my great great grandfather William Dinsmore being the surveyor for the current Hampden when it opened in 1903. You can blame him on why we are so far from the pitch.

My dad took me to my first game when I was 10 in 1984. Scotland 3, Iceland 0. Two for Paul McStay, one for Charlie Nicholas, a captivated heart for me.

Scotland scored four goals against Denmark to clinch qualification

I still remember the sheer thrill of holding my dad's hand while walking through the cold dark towards the stadium, squeezing our way through the tartan-clad crowds towering over me, who were downing drinks I'd never seen and saying words I'd never heard. The glowing floodlights offering the possibility of wonders ahead. It was absolute magic.

Dalglish weaving his way to his 30th Scotland goal against Spain, James McFadden popping one in from 40 yards in Paris, Ollie McBurnie sclaffing one against the post during a 1-0 defeat in a meaningless friendly at the Azteca. I was there for them all.

In recent years, my job as the BBC's entertainment correspondent and becoming stepfather to two boys who cruelly are not qualified to play for Scotland (adoption does not count apparently) has reduced the number of times I get to go to games.

But my heart is always there.

On the day of our crucial World Cup qualifier against Denmark, I was reporting for the BBC1 One O'clock and Six O'clock News, on the government's plans to make it illegal to resell tickets to gigs and live events at more than face value.

I may have snuck one of my old SFA Travel Club Scotland badges into my report, by wearing it on my coat, outside the Brixton Academy in London.

Colin and his friend Ally celebrating Shaun Maloney's wonder goal in a 1-0 victory over the Republic of Ireland in 2014

I got a few messages from eagle-eyed Scotland fans saying how much they had enjoyed it.

However, earlier in the day, while interviewing Gus from Mercury Prize-winner's alt-j, for his reaction to the ticket price news, I realised I had lost the back of the badge, so put it in my pocket, for safekeeping.

Later that afternoon I rammed my hand into that pocket and jabbed my finger. I thought nothing more about it, other than it had briefly been quite sore.

Colin's Scotland badge looked fairly harmless at first

That Tuesday night was simply one of the greatest ever.

I was there in St Etienne in 1998 when Scotland last played at the World Cup.

Now, watching with my mate Johnnie, the same friend with whom I went to that disastrous Morocco game, it was hard to sum up the total joy of Scotland 4 Denmark 2.

This was the Scotland match we had been waiting for all our lives.

Three of the greatest ever Scotland goals in one game when it most mattered. If Shankland had not touched Ferguson's corner, which was already going in, then it would have been four.

The most un-Scottish of Scottish performances.

The next day's Reporting Scotland was extended to an hour - 60 minutes of astounding goals, people singing, dancing and cheering. I have simply never seen my country so happy. It was wonderful.

Serious infection

Two days after the match, a small bruise appeared under my fingernail.

Things escalated quickly.

After the weekend I went to the chemist, and they recommended some Ibuprofen to reduce the swelling.

On Tuesday, a week after the prick from the badge, I had an online GP appointment and was given antibiotics for a skin infection.

On Wednesday I had to travel to Gloucestershire to interview David Tennant and Danny Dyer on the set of the second series of the Disney+ smash, Rivals.

It was a night shoot, and the sub-zero temperatures were making my right index finger hurt in a way it should not. The following morning, the same finger put my colleagues right off their Premier Inn breakfast sausages.

On Thursday I went to hospital to have my finger X-rayed.

And on Friday it turned into truly the worst Craig David song of all time.

Overnight my finger had become more hideous than Antony Ralston's backpass against Switzerland at last year's Euros.

I went straight to hospital, was put on an IV drip and transferred to another hospital where I had to stay overnight, while doctors murmured about a serious infection and me having to sign waivers.

The finger prick escalated and Colin had to be taken in for surgery

I awoke to the less-than-ideal news it had been the ward's Christmas party the night before. The staff coffee machine was doing, shall we say, "brisk business".

Thankfully at 13:40, just 20 minutes before the cut-off for new operations ("cut-off", not a phrase I wanted to hear being used at all) I was told I would be seen that day.

The whole procedure only lasted eight minutes, or the time it took Mansfield 103.2 FM to play Tom's Diner by Suzanne Vega and Sheryl Crow's If It Makes You Happy – a winning combination of local radio and local anaesthetic.

The operation appears to have been a success. My nail has gone, so has a lot of skin, and those doctors going "That is a lot of pus" is a memory that will haunt me for a long time.

My finger is now wrapped in a bandage as large as that sported by Richard Gough in the 1990 League Cup final. It is not hurting, but I am not going to be solving Scotland's goalkeeping problems anytime soon.

Colin was glad to have all 10 fingers as well as his team in the 2026 World Cup

I do feel ashamed to have taken up so much NHS time, due to one little prick, but as my brother Michael helpfully pointed out, "It is a long time since we've qualified for a World Cup. There was 28 years of bacteria on that badge."

The offending item has now been sterilised and will be coming to the USA with me next summer, albeit with a new clip on the back.

Would I go through all this again if it meant Scotland made it out of the group stages? The last 16, then we'd be talking.

I am truly thrilled to still have as many fingers as the number of players Denmark players had on the pitch at the end of that game.

But, please, one request – do not buy me Subbuteo for Christmas.