Music cafe for domestic abuse survivors relaunches

A weekly music therapy cafe for victims of domestic violence is launching in Swindon thanks to new funding.

The Better with Music cafe's mission is to "empower women and girls" and it first operated as a pop-up last year.

Free sessions include mental health and wellbeing support for women and girls who have experienced domestic violence, sexual abuse or related trauma.

Funding from the National Lottery Community Fund and the Wiltshire Community Foundation has secured its future for the next 12 months.

Luiza Moir, music therapist and founder of the Better with Music cafe

Luiza Moir, 57, is a music therapist and founder of the drop-in sessions which are based in Baker's Cafe every Thursday from 14:00 to 18:00.

Mrs Moir said the cafe is a place for women and girls to be "believed, to be heard and to talk about the things that perhaps they've never said".

Being "scared" to speak out is something that Mrs Moir recognises and she believes music is a great place to start.

She said: "This is a place for people to talk about things that perhaps they were scared to say out loud.

"Not everybody can talk about difficult things so music is a very appealing medium.

"You can talk through music, you can play your emotions, your feelings, much easier than just talking about it."

'Going to survive'

Mrs Moir is also a musician, songwriter, producer and a survivor of domestic abuse herself.

In 1996, aged 29, she left her husband, taking her eight-year-old daughter, a keyboard and a suitcase with her.

"I was going to survive and started writing songs about my pain, placing my experience in music which always was there for me, and seemed the safest place of all, still is," she said.

It took her more than 20 years to develop the concept behind Better with Music.

"I managed to write some songs for other artists and sold some of them, getting back on my feet economically," she said.

"I realised that after every song I wrote about my pain and mental struggles, I feel lighter, happier and stronger too."

"Recently I took a music therapy MA, which was the result of me wanting to learn about what’s behind the healing aspect of music, to understand how more effectively I can help other people doing what I’m so passionate about," she added.

Amanda Mathieson, 65, continued to receive abusive text messages from her ex-husband almost 30 years after leaving him.

Mrs Mathieson said: "They [text messages] were quite vile, so for 29 years I'd been suffering abuse from him.

"I hadn't thought about blocking him, just wrong generation I guess, I hadn't thought about that."

Each message took Mrs Mathieson back to being married, in a "situation I couldn't escape" she said.

Therapeutic process

Writing her own song helped Mrs Mathieson overcome her trauma, despite not initially believing she had the musical ability to do so.

"I can't sing, I've got no music skills whatsoever," she said.

Mrs Moir convinced her that if she could read and write then she could write a song.

Several months later Mrs Mathieson had written and performed her song, 29 Years, which she found therapeutic.

"When you've sung that last note it's such a massive big relief, a weight that came off my shoulders," she said.

"It's my story, my words."

Each week those at the cafe write lyrics and perform together

Mrs Mathieson now volunteers at the café each week, serving free food and drinks to other women and girls.

Being involved with the group and her own experience of music therapy has left Mrs Mathieson feeling "10ft tall".

"I feel there's nobody sitting on my shoulder, chipping away at me, taking something from me," she said.

"I do feel empowered, I do feel a stronger woman and proud to say 'I am a survivor'."