Rise in children suffering domestic violence

Charity reports 'shocking' rise in number of children and teens needing domestic abuse support.

The number of children who suffer or witness domestic violence, in Dorset and the Isle of Wight, has soared by 71% over the last two years, according to a local charity.

The YOU Trust helped 318 children aged over 5 in the year ending April 2024, up from 186 in 2022.

Among those in distress are a growing number of teenagers being abused - not by parents - but by boyfriends, girlfriends or new partners, as they embark on their first relationships.

CEO Hayley Connor said: "We definitely have a crisis on our hands and we have to do something about this."

The Fareham based charity provides counselling to children and teenagers, which aims to empower survivors to escape violence and protect themselves.

Whether children witness domestic abuse between parents, or suffer it themselves, Hayley Connor believes intervening early means they can "change lives".

She said without support youngsters may end up victims in multiple abusive relationships or go on to become perpetrators of domestic violence themselves.

Hayley Connor from The YOU Trust said intervening early is critical

“That is very, very shocking," said Amanda, from Dorset, who has suffered years of abuse herself, "I think it's frightening".

Amanda - not her real name - has experienced three long torturously abusive relationships. At the beginning of the first one, things were going well.

“I thought it was OK", she said, "It was for maybe a few months. And then I got slapped round the face, but he swore he'd never do it again. And I believed him.

"Then it started getting worse," said Amanda. "He took control of my money. I had cracked ribs and wasn’t allowed to go to hospital.

"He tried to drown me in the bathroom and there was cigarette burns on my shoulders and arms.

“I kind of blamed myself. I thought it was because I was keeping doing something wrong”

She told family about the violence, but no one believed her.

Eventually the authorities intervened after spotting her bruises. Her abuser wasn’t prosecuted - a restraining order was issued instead.

'Amanda' (R) told Correspondent, Nikki Mitchell, she rather spend the rest of her life alone, than risk being abused again

The level of degrading sexual abuse Amanda survived at the hands of her third abuser is too agonising for her to describe in detail.

“It was very dark at the end. He was very callous and I had a daughter by then".

Amanda still has flashbacks and nightmares.

"It’s too late for me, but I wouldn't want any person to go through what I've been through."

To those suffering she pleads: "Don’t put up with it. Whatever your age tell someone. Get help and get out."

Hayley Connor described Amanda's story as "heartwrenching", especially as no one believed her when she asked for help.

She said: "I can guarantee we will believe you and for someone to say I believe you and I want to listen to you, can often be the key to unlocking a better life and restoring a victims confidence."

If you are affected by issues raised in this article help and support is available via the BBC Action Line.

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