Ex-soldier turns life around after violent urges

Cameron Alexander had to leave the Army after struggling with his mental health

A former British Army soldier who experienced depression and "violent compulsions" has embarked on a year-long fundraising mission to "turn a negative into a positive".

Cameron Alexander, 39, based in Swindon, Wiltshire, joined the Army at the age of 17 and served for more than 21 years, excelling through the ranks.

But in September 2023, the father-of-two started experiencing "intrusive" thoughts of hurting himself and other men, and in February this year he was medically discharged on mental health grounds.

He hopes his monthly physical challenges, including completing 2,000 burpees throughout February, will break the "massive stigma attached to mental health, especially amongst men".

"I felt like I was hiding away at first but then I thought, I'm not going to hide this anymore, I'm going to own it," Mr Alexander said.

"The best thing to do is to talk about it, or talk to someone who you think is struggling," he added.

Mr Alexander, who held the title of Warrant Officer Class Two, the second highest position for soldiers, also experienced OCD and obsessions and was later diagnosed with anxiety and depression.

Now working as a civil servant, his fundraising efforts, which see him complete a different challenge each month, have raised more than £1,900 for charities including Combat Stress, the Teenage Cancer Trust and Mind.

The former soldier, who lives with his wife, Vikki, 46, and his two sons, Ryan, 17, and Jack, 15, said: "I started looking at my situation as a way to try and help others, to try and turn a negative into a positive."

"Taking that first step makes a massive difference – it puts a light on in the distance."

Mr Alexander hopes speaking out about his mental health struggles will encourage others to do the same

After Mr Alexander started experiencing "very violent" thoughts, he was instructed to start working from home to protect himself and those around him.

"It was really from there where I realised I was starting to struggle with mental health," he said, adding he was then worried about going into public spaces.

He was helped throughout this time by the Departments of Community Mental Health, which offer mental health support to serving army personnel and reservists.

But he said he "almost felt embarrassed" to talk about his mental health.

"Any time someone asked me about it, I'd just sort of shrug it off," he said.

"As time went on, I started to realise there was nothing to be embarrassed about and I wanted to use my situation to try and help.

"When people started asking me about it, I'd sit there and open up about my mental health struggles," he said, hoping it would help others do the same.

Mr Alexander served in the Army for 21 years

Mr Alexander's challenges have also included running 2.5k (1.5 miles) every hour for 25 hours while carrying 25lbs (11.3kg), sleeping outside for the entire month of March and his favourite yet, as he is joined by his son, Jack, to complete various indoor bouldering challenges.

He said he continues to struggle with his mental health but he has been able to "cope" by identifying his triggers and having therapy regularly.

He does not have a fixed plan for the rest of the year but hopes to take on a cycling challenge in September.

"It's not so much about the money, but the small steps and to me, those small steps make a big difference," he said.