Ray BLK: Why debut album Access Denied has taken so long to make

"I am the same artist, but I'm a different person now."

It's been four-and-a-half years since Ray BLK beat the likes of Rag'n'Bone Man, Tom Grennan, Dave and Jorja Smith to become the first ever unsigned winner of the BBC's annual Sound Of poll.

Previous winners such as Ellie Goulding, Sam Smith and Years & Years went on to achieve overnight success.

Ray tells Radio 1 Newsbeat the "usual progression" for someone winning the title is "dropping your debut album, everything going crazy, screaming... and then you're Adele".

But it didn't pan out that way for her.

Instead, the RnB singer has waited and negotiated the hazards of the music industry, which have tested her confidence, patience and mental health.

"I can't even begin to tell you the hurdles my team and I have leapt over," she says.

The 26-year-old, from south-east London, is finally ready to release her first feature length album, Access Denied - and explains why it's taken so long.

"I lost my way for a while," says Ray

Although she'd been nominated for a MOBO award in 2016, winning the BBC title in 2017 brought a new level of exposure that Ray says she nearly "couldn't handle".

At that point, she was a newcomer in an "overwhelming" industry.

"I had no clue what was going on. I was just bright-eyed and bushy-tailed and thought whatever my manager suggested I'd roll with."

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Ray was paired with pop producers who shaped songs they thought would be hits - or music they thought people would want her to make.

The problem? She wasn't feeling it.

In a 2019 TEDx talk, she explained how she'll never again perform one of her early singles, Doin' Me, because it "compromised" her sound so she could "fit in".

A year later, she signed to Island Records - part of label Universal Music - in her first major record deal.

Ray says her friends think she's two different people in one body: a "boss" but also "sensitive and emotional"

The deal with Island gave Ray new opportunities and a lot of her 2018 extended EP, Empress, was written and recorded in the US.

But the experience left her feeling out of place and lonely.

"I was getting into sessions with strangers and people were cancelling on me," she says.

"It was just so difficult and I knew nobody."

'I felt so lost'

During her time there, Ray was asked to support Nicki Minaj - "a dream for me" - and that opportunity gave her the spark to complete Empress.

"I'm proud of that record, but I felt so lost after releasing it," she says.

Despite feeling low, she says she's come out of the experience "a stronger person" with the resilience she needed to take charge of herself.

"I had to stop crying every day and make the best thing possible."

Ray BLK performing at the Forum in London pre-pandemic in 2019

In 2019, Ray started work on her full length debut and let herself be "a little bit of a diva".

"I just didn't allow myself to be controlled by anybody - I got to do exactly what I wanted to do," she says.

Some of her past experiences of the industry are documented in her single, Dark Skinned, with lyrics such as: "Losing count of all the times that I had to cry. And dry my tears, pull up my socks, cos I have to try."

Even discussing the lyrics makes her emotional and reminds her of "a lack of self-belief".

"I've had to continue picking myself up over and over again," she says.

Two events pushing Ray down as she worked on her album were the Covid pandemic and the Black Lives Matter movement.

She marked the one-year anniversary of the death of George Floyd with a performance of Marvin Gaye's What's Goin' On for Radio 1Xtra, which she describes as "a bittersweet moment".

"I can see change happening gradually, but it's heartbreaking that it took one thing so horrific to happen to see it," she says.

Ray thinks progress can be made "by having people from diverse backgrounds in positions of power".

"It's great to have a statue of a black person in the middle of somewhere or for a brand to change their aesthetic or become more inclusive, but real change needs to come from the inside," she says.

"If it's gradual and continuous then it's real - I don't want bursts of fake stuff."

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Unlike previous releases, Ray's had "a lot of fun" making Access Denied and has collaborated with the likes of Giggs, Kojey Radical and Stefflon Don.

Now that it's finished, she can finally say she's "proud" of her first album, which is out on 17 September.

"I'm not pretending to be somebody else. It wasn't rushed. It's been a blessing."

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