Knife crime: 'We do not want their lives to be in vain'
- Published
Almost twenty years apart, two families experienced the same heartbreak when their loved ones were fatally stabbed.
On 29 June 2023, 25-year-old Ashish Nahar was stabbed while walking through Jubilee Park in Bedford.
Ben Hardwidge, 22, was stabbed 50 times during an attack in the Essex village of Birchanger, near Bishop's Stortford, on 1 March 2004.
Relatives of both men are calling for people to understand the tragic consequences and ripple effects of carrying a knife.
'Knife crime is beyond a joke'
Mr Nahar was stabbed in the heart by teenager Kamil Serba, who was jailed for 14-and-a-half years in December.
"He was a fun, happy, cheerful and very caring boy", says mother Anita Nahar.
She recalled telling a friend about how well he was doing, turning his life around. Three hours later she was telling the same friend her son was dead.
She says she often becomes frustrated when talking to the parents of other people killed as a result of knife violence.
"Knife crime is beyond a joke... it's a serious crime that's ripping people apart, it's tearing people apart."
She hopes speaking about her experience would mean Ashish's death was "not in vain".
"I need to keep going for my little boy," she says. "Everyone's broken."
"It's sad to think of the number of times this has and will be said by mothers grieving their sons, but knife crime has to end.
"Talk to your child, the way you teach them about sexual abuse and strangers, talk to them about knives. The severity of it, the damage it does."
Mr Nahar's grandfather, Darshan Lall, says he struggles to comfort his daughter and to come to terms himself with what happened.
"I was always protective of Ashish, I miss him," he says.
"Life changed in just a few seconds.
"I can't explain to no-one how I miss him. My grandson is gone."
He says it has been "very hard" to see his daughter lose a child.
"When she starts talking about Ashish, she starts crying. My heart, it's broken because I can't handle it."
He joins his daughter in supporting police action to target people carrying knives.
"I need more support to stop knife crime and I need support from the public as well to stop knife crime."
'It destroyed us'
Ben Hardwidge, 22, had been involved in a confrontation involving three other people when he was stabbed by an 18-year-old man, who was later jailed for his murder.
His brother James Hardwidge, 40, said 20 years after his brother's death, his family has never recovered.
"Ben was a very popular guy, very funny, I always looked up to him, he was my older brother.
"It destroyed us really.
"I still find it hard to talk about today. It kind of split everything up and changed our lives forever."
Hearing of other families, like Mr Nahar's, experiencing the same trauma "brings back the memories", he says.
"I can't see why it's not got better. When I see it reported I think 'oh not again'.
"No-one is learning any lessons and I don't want Ben's death to be in vain. I just want people to realise the impact of knife crime.
"It destroys lives, destroys families not just for the victim but the person doing it."
'We will not let up in our actions'
In Essex, where Mr Hardwidge was killed, more than 23,000 weapons were destroyed by police last year.
On average, the force says it takes about two tonnes of knives off the streets every year.
Detection gates are one type of deterrent used by police.
In Southend, officers plan to use them throughout the summer on the promenade and pier to make people think before bringing a knife into the city centre.
In Bedfordshire, the police force has introduced a new initiative called Just Drop It.
Supt Alex House said: "We must all do our part to tackle knife crime and take dangerous weapons off our streets."Just one family affected by knife crime is a family too many, as can be seen by the devastating impact Ashish's death had on his family. We will not let up in our actions to reduce knife crime nor our enforcement against those that perpetuate it."
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