Anxiety and depression: Man shares his story in bid to help others

Thomas says his dog Eddie also helped him overcome difficulties

Feelings of anxiety and depression can creep up on anyone - and be overwhelming. Thomas experienced this for himself and tried to dismiss symptoms of his growing mental health problems out of a misplaced sense of shame, something that ultimately led to him trying to take his own life. He shares his story to help encourage others to seek the support they need.

"I thought of myself as the sort of person who had real grit and determination, that I could cope with anything," says 37-year-old Thomas, who lives in a Hampshire village.

"I thought I could just deal with it - and that turned out not to be the case."

In his lowest moments, Thomas felt like he did not want to go on any longer - but still resisted seeking professional help.

"I was waking up at 02:00 in the morning and having panic attacks... I did open up a little bit to people but I didn't open up to the true extent of how bad things really were," he says.

"I didn't know where it was coming from but I just decided that I could deal with it, that I could just push it down."

Thomas feels in a much better place now

But this approach failed and, in July 2020, he made the first of several attempts to take his own life.

He was referred to a specialist NHS team and received treatment for the first time - something Thomas ultimately cites as a turning point in his life for the better.

"I just remember collapsing on the floor in floods of tears just thinking 'how does anybody recover from this?' he says.

"How I felt at that time and how I feel now are really very different."

But that process - not only to start on the road to recovery but also to lose that sense of shame he felt about his own feelings - took time.

Tips for coping right now

• Try not to think about the future - just focus on getting through today

• Stay away from drugs and alcohol

• Get yourself to a safe place, like a friend's house

• Be around other people

• Do something you usually enjoy, such as spending time with a pet

Source: NHS website

It has been three years and Thomas now feels stronger and is eager for others not to "bottle things up" like he did and to seek help before it is too late.

"You can reach the very depth of despair and you can come back from it," he says.

"Don't think that the only way to deal with things is just to sit there and let it build up inside your head. Talk to somebody, get help, talk to your doctor.

"There is a culture I think of not complaining, of just coping with the things that life throws at you and not talking about it, not acknowledging that life can be really really hard sometimes.

"Mental health is - even if it's not something that you suffer from personally - something that will touch everybody's life at some point and it's the kind of thing that we need to have more of a conversation about."

He has decided to share his story to support the Hampshire and Isle of Wight Air Ambulance - the paramedics from which saved his life.

Keith Wilson, from the service, says any money raised by Thomas will help others.

He says: "Not only are we incredibly touched and grateful to Thomas for sharing his story, but we are immensely pleased that someone so seriously ill at the time of our arrival has made such an incredible recovery."

Help and support

If you're affected by any of the issues in this article you can find details of organisations who can help via the BBC Action Line.