Oxfordshire woman, 75, opens up about abuse for first time

Dot admits until recently she had "deep down buried inside" what happened to her (picture shows model)

Dot was sexually assaulted between the ages of six and 13.

Now 75, she has started talking about it for the first time, and she wants others to know it is never too late to seek help.

When Dot told her vicar what happened to her as a child, she "felt like a load had been lifted" and cried non-stop for 20 minutes.

"I don't know how many flipping hankies I got through," she tells the BBC.

"I've got a pretty strong constitution, I've had a lot of heartache in my life, but apart from not being able to have children, I think that's the most I've ever cried.

"Afterwards I just thought why am I hanging on to this? I'd hung on to it for so long."

Dot lives in Oxfordshire with her partner, and has been both a registered childminder and foster mother.

She admits until recently she had "sort of deep down buried inside" what happened to her when she was younger.

But she found herself opening up one day to a vicar, who is also a "dear friend".

"Suddenly I felt, 'I can trust you'. I spoke to him about it and he was horrified," she explained.

'Inherent fear'

Dot is a committed Christian. She says she would be unable to say The Lord's Prayer, particularly the line "we forgive those who trespass against us", if she had not come to terms with her past in some way.

"They're both dead now," she says of her abusers. "At the end of the day, it's not me they've got to answer to, it's God. I just feel sorry that they felt the need to do it."

She has since had counselling and "over time... I learned it wasn't my fault".

Dot said she had felt an "inherent fear, an inherent anger" but that began to fade as she spoke about it more.

She adds: "It's something you can't ever put behind you but it's happened, there's nothing I can do about it happening.

"But what I can do now is change my attitude at looking at it."

Her main advice to anyone else who has gone through something similar is to "talk".

"Don't leave it as long as I did. It's not going to be easy. I didn't find it easy. Whether it's sexual or physical [abuse] don't do what I did, don't hold it in, speak out."

If you have been affected by any of the issues raised in this story you can visit BBC Action Line.

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