'Don't let stigmas stop you asking for help,' says Suffolk mum

Caroline Mugambi says her "cultural background" may have contributed to her feeling like she could not ask for help

Weeks after the birth of her second child, Caroline Mugambi broke down in tears at a local parent support group. She believes her "cultural background" contributed to her feeling she could not "speak out about problems". Now she is encouraging any parent struggling to cope to reach out.

Ms Mugambi, 39, was put in touch with Home-Start in Suffolk - at family support charity that helped more than 900 families in the last year.

It supports parents' mental health by organising home visits from volunteers, offering weekly group meetings and helps families navigate any problems they may be facing.

Six years after her referral to the charity, Ms Mugambi is now a trustee and says she wants to share her story to "normalise asking for help if we need it".

She says: "My cultural background as a black African woman means we don't speak out about problems and often find ourselves struggling on our own in silence.

"You just feel alone, you feel like no-one really understands. But as a mother you still have to struggle and keep your head up and look after your kids.

"I had a few-weeks-old baby and a four-year-old who needed help and I struggled with everything."

Had it not been for people seeing her cry, she probably would have never asked for help, she says.

"Looking back, I probably had post-natal depression but I didn't realise it at the time," she adds.

She is now working with charity Home-Start to encourage other parents to speak up when they are struggling with their mental health

At first she was reluctant to accept help from the charity but says time with her support volunteer Janet felt like "my safe space".

"To me, Home-Start support was like taking the weight off your shoulders for a while, so you can be the parent you want to be," she says.

Janet helped by signposting other services, sorting childcare and practicalities, including organising getting a stair gate installed.

"I can't imagine how hard it would have been without Janet," she says. "She touched our lives."

'Real stigma'

According to a report from the Maternal Mental Health Alliance, problems in the perinatal period affect one in five women.

Tara Spence, chief executive of Home-Start in Suffolk, says: "It's not something we really talk about. We don't say, after we've had a baby that we really struggle.

"We talk about the joys of having a baby but at least 70% of our referrals will come because somebody's having a post-natal challenge.

"We would love to encourage mums who are finding things difficult to take the brave decision to reach out for support. Parenting is hard. It can be wonderful, but it can also be lonely and frustrating."