Deadly rivalry - the ruthless world of craft homeworks
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A working volcano, a World War One trench system, the RMS Titanic, a flashing lighthouse - it's a seemingly random list of objects that can strike fear into the heart of parents with primary-age children.
The announcement that your child has "forgotten" they were supposed to build a model fairground and it's due in tomorrow can prompt a smelly dive into the recycling to retrieve bits of cardboard and yoghurt pots.
Other parents are much better organised, to the point of spending hours of hard graft building a Viking longship while the child rubs glue on to the sofa.
Kerry Foster's daughter was set one of the classic Northern Ireland craft homeworks - to build a model of the Titanic out of scrap from the recycling bin.
They worked together on the model and were happy with the the result.
"Then her dad came home and asked her if it was Peppa Pig," said Ms Foster.
The following day they took the model to school and it was clear that some parents had been working overtime on their models of the doomed liner.
"One of them even even had smoke coming out of the chimneys," said Kerry.
"No child in P6 could have created that out of the recycling," she said.
Craft homeworks can cause a kind of arms race with parents vying to come up with the most impressive model.
It's such a touchy subject that some school principals shy away from talking about it.
Some schools encourage the competitive aspect by presenting trophies for the best models, others don't set craft homeworks because they recognise that some children have less parental support than others.
Keith Wysner, principal of Whiteabbey Primary School, near Belfast, said there was a balance to be struck: "Sometimes it's been a lovely opportunity for the family to make a piece together or sometimes it's just a hassle."
If you want to see what the child is capable of then you need to get them to do it in the classroom, Mr Wysner believes.
"There is a humorous aspect to it - sometimes a model of Notre Dame comes in made of matchsticks, or there's the model made by dad at the breakfast table and it's still wet."
From his perspective, homework is more about letting parents know how their child is getting on at school.
Erin Ferguson's daughter won a school trophy for the best P7 home craftwork with her fairy garden.
Ms Ferguson admits that she is "quite competitive", starting work on the project in June of the P6 year - it took 600 matches to build the garden's Irish cottage - not forgetting the furniture.
Then there was the "working" water fountain and fairy lights.
And for the piece de resistance: "I grew a bonsai tree."
Cheryl Rodgers is a little dubious about the craft homework phenomenon.
Her son had to make a Spitfire out of junk, and a musical instrument:
"They display them in the hall. Everyone else's was spectacular - his was a bit disappointing."
Her family is "quite arty" and they enjoy the time spent working together but Ms Rodgers prefers another sort of creative homework.
"They all get dressed up as pharaohs or evacuees. For an Egyptian he basically had to wear a skirt but he didn't mind," she said.
Another project involved building an iron giant - one of the models was six-feet tall and another had flashing lights.
"The daddies can get quite competitive - more so than the mummies," Ms Rodgers said.
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Brian Keenan made a remarkable Transformers costume for his son to wear at the school Halloween disco.
The outfit wasn't strictly a school homework but Mr Keenan has been involved in quite a few these - the most recent being an eagle made with his daughter.
"It can be quite time-consuming," he says, "but is a great way to spend time with your kids".
CBeebies' Let's Go Club, the home of crafty craft skills presents - Rubber Glove Bagpipes
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If you don't have the crafty skills but are determined that your child should wow the class there's even a company in India that will complete a spectacular project for you - for a small fee of course.
But it's unlikely they'll be able to knock off a Viking helmet and get it shipped to you by Tuesday.
The best advice seems to be to make it a proper joint effort for parents and children. But be careful - and don't try to dry out papier-mache in the oven.
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