Same-sex adoption: ‘I never thought I’d be a parent in Northern Ireland'

"Both of us had really loved the idea of being parents, but grew up thinking this wouldn't be an option, so it's amazing it has come full circle."

Paul Wright from Belfast and his husband Martin adopted their son two years ago.

It's been a decade since Northern Ireland laws changed to allow same-sex couples to adopt for the first time.

It was the last part of the UK to implement the change.

During 2022/23, 13% of adoptions in Northern Ireland were with same-sex couples.

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'We're a family now'

The law change has had a profound impact on Paul's life.

He said: "I've been with my partner Martin for 23 years now, and for the majority of our relationship, parenting just wasn't on the cards.

"But when the legislation changed, we just both looked at each other and said - 'right we're going to do this.'"

Paul and Martin adopted their son just before the Covid-19 pandemic.

The process took about two and a half years.

Paul added: "It's a robust process, and it has to be, but it's been amazing.

"He's a great wee kid and he's settled really well with us, we're a family now."

Legal battle

The ban on same-sex adoption was overturned in the courts following a lengthy legal process which was resisted by the then Health Minister at Stormont, Edwin Poots.

In 2013 the Northern Ireland Human Rights Commission won a judicial review on the grounds that the eligibility criteria for the existing adoption legislation discriminated against same-sex and unmarried heterosexual couples.

The impact on same sex adoptions in Northern Ireland was slow to start.

In 2015/16 only 6% of adoptions in Northern Ireland were with same-sex couples.

Since then the numbers of applications from same-sex couples has risen steadily.

By 2019/20, 10% of adoptions in Northern Ireland were same sex couples.

The latest figures show that during 2022/23, 13% of adoptions in Northern Ireland were with same sex couples.

Meanwhile, recent figures for England show that 16% of children were adopted by same-sex parents.

'They're not alone'

Earlier this year the National Lottery Community Fund gave £6.3m to groups across Northern Ireland.

This included £10,000 to Adoption UK to support activities for adoptive families in Northern Ireland where the child has been adopted by LGBTQ+ parents.

EJ Havlin, the Northern Ireland Director of Adoption UK, believes visibility of same-sex adopters is important.

EJ Havlin says visibility for families is really important

She said: "With our LGBT support group we run family days so that children who live with same-sex families cans see other families like them, so they know they're not alone.

"It's important the same-sex community who are adopting are proud and be acknowledge for what they're doing, because there are children out there waiting for families."

Paul has been supporting other potential same sex adoptive parents through Adoption UK's support group.

He said: "We want to let other people in the LGBT community know that adoption is available to them.

Paul says their son has settled in well

"Because while it's a rigorous process, it's no different than the process for any other couple or parent."

He added: "We've been lucky in that we haven't experienced a significant amount of prejudice or anything like that.

"As parents we've just been getting on with it and I'm grateful that we're part of a generation that can do this and it means the world to us."