I survived cancer while it was killing my husband

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MacLaren familyImage source, Cancer Research UK
Image caption,

Shona MacLaren and husband William were both diagnosed with cancer within months

Shona MacLaren describes her husband William as her rock - her "everything".

Last year, when she was told she had cervical cancer and suffered a panic attack, he remained a steady source of calm.

When her hair began to fall out due to chemotherapy, it was Will who shaved it off.

"He was right there by my side as he always had been and he promised we'd get through this together," she said.

Less than four months after Shona learned of her own illness, Will had died from bowel cancer, age 41.

Two weeks previously he had taken daughter Thea to her first day of school.

Image source, Cancer Research UK

"I can't explain why I survived cancer and Will didn't," said Shona. "I suffer from survivor's guilt that I am here and Will isn't.

"We both kept fit, we didn't smoke and rarely drank.

"What should have been one of the happiest times in our lives as a young family became the stuff of nightmares."

The couple from Stevenston, North Ayrshire, had grown up together, having fallen in love as teenagers.

Image source, Cancer Research UK

In June 2021 they welcomed the arrival of their second child, Mason - but Shona began experiencing problems with bleeding.

She had a smear test the following February but the results were inconclusive and she was referred to hospital for another test.

Shona's mother had died when she was 11 from pancreatic cancer and the wait for results, she says, was terrifying.

"I remember lying on the table during the examination and I could tell by the doctor's voice that something was wrong," she said.

"I was told to prepare myself for the results to confirm it was cancer. I just sat there and cried."

After being diagnosed in May 2022, Shona, an accountant, began treatment at the West of Scotland Beatson Cancer Centre in Glasgow.

Image source, Cancer Research UK
Image caption,

Thea, left, helped cut her mother's ponytail when her hair began to fall out

But by that point Will - an IT director and basketball coach - was experiencing his own health issues.

He had suffered for several years from ulcerative colitis, causing inflammation and sores inside the bowel which can increase the risk of bowel cancer.

That summer he experienced severe pain in his abdomen.

His previous two bowel cancer screening tests had come back clear, but when the pain worsened, Will was admitted to hospital for further tests.

'My treatment was working'

Just 24 hours later, the couple were told Will had advanced bowel cancer which was terminal.

Shona said: "You hear about these radical remission stories and William vowed right from the start that he was going to be one of them.

"I'd just received results to say that there was a definite shrinkage of my tumour. My cancer treatment was working but there was nothing to celebrate with so much going on."

Days after his diagnosis, Will was sent home where he deteriorated quickly.

He was moved to Ayrshire Hospice where he died on 1 September.

"I couldn't believe it," Shona said. "This was the man I'd loved since I was a teenager, the man I shared my life with, the man I thought I'd grow old with and he was gone."

Image source, Cancer Research UK

Having completed cancer treatment in November last year, Shona has now turned her attention to raising awareness.

On Tuesday she helps launch Race for Life in Scotland and plans to take part in the Glasgow event on 21 May - along with loved ones who "pulled her through" the last year.

She also hopes her story will encourage people to take up cervical screenings as well as the HPV vaccination, which is offered to children age 11 to 13 and protects against cervical cancer.

Her run, she says, will be for a cure and for all families living with cancer.

"Cancer doesn't discriminate," Shona added. "My children mean the world to me and it's incredibly tough knowing they'll grow up without their dad.

"Although he's gone from sight, he will always be in our hearts. "

Image source, Mark Anderson

Race for Life, run by Cancer Research UK, is a series of events across the country beginning in Stirling on 30 April.

It raises funds for research to help tackle 200 types of cancer.

People can take part in 3k, 5k and 10k races as well as tackle mud-soaked assault courses in the Pretty Muddy and Pretty Muddy Kids events.

Lisa Adams, Cancer Research UK's spokeswoman in Scotland, said she was grateful to Shona for her support as the event enters its 30th year.

She said: "Sadly, cancer affects all of us in some way.

"Whether people are living with cancer, taking part in honour of or in memory of a loved one with cancer, or signing up to protect their own children's future, everyone has a reason to Race for Life."

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