Domestic abuse: 'I think I could have saved my daughter from murder'

A mum has spoken of her pain as she believes she could have saved her daughter from murder, had police not let her family down.

"Kind" Lauren Griffiths was murdered by her "self-obsessed manipulator" of a fiancé Madog Rowlands a year after he tried to strangle her at their flat.

Lauren's family believe they should have been told of the previous attack because of her mental health struggles.

South Wales Police said it did not have the right to tell Lauren's family.

Rowlands murdered Lauren in April 2019 then wrapped the 21-year-old's body in clingfilm at their Cardiff flat and had drugs, a Subway and a Domino's pizza delivered before he phoned 999 more than 24 hours later.

Lauren Griffiths (right) liked going to watch rugby with sister Alisha and dad Jason

The 23-year-old student was convicted and sentenced to life in prison but the family of "brilliant big sister" Lauren feel she could still be alive if more had been done to support her.

Alison Turner said the first she knew of Rowlands' previous attempt to strangle her daughter in March 2018 was after Lauren had been killed.

When police turned up at their flat after that first attack, Lauren told officers she had entered into a suicide pact with Rowlands but then changed her mind and he flew into a rage.

Lauren was described as a typical "girly girl" who liked dressing up

"It wasn't a straight up domestic, there was so much more to it," Alison told BBC Wales Live.

"I honestly think if we did know, of course it would have changed things.

"She agreed to do a suicide pact and changed her mind. That should have raised alarm bells and the police should have got in touch with us.

"He admitted he tried to kill her. It should have been dealt with better."

Lauren has been described as an independent "kind and loving" sister

While Lauren was 19 at the time of the assault, her sister Alisha said, due to her mental health issues, she should have had more support from the police because of this.

There is a project known as Clare's Law where people can find out from police if their partner has a history of domestic violence and while family and friends can also make inquiries, forces are unable to make "proactive disclosures" to family members.

Lauren, who was diagnosed with dissociative personality disorder in 2016, was the second eldest of seven children and "loved" making up bedtime stories for her younger twin siblings.

Lauren enjoyed being a big sister to her five younger siblings

Her older sister described Lauren as a "girly girl" who dyed her hair different colours, loved to wear make-up and enjoyed Halloween and dressing up.

She was an avid reader, always with a book in her hand, and Alisha said Lauren was "kind and loving" and "would give you the last pound in your purse."

Lauren met Rowlands in college in Wrexham and moved from her hometown of Oswestry in Shropshire to Cardiff in 2017 to be with him while he studied computer animation at university.

Lauren loved going on family holidays

Alisha said Lauren changed dramatically over the course of her relationship with Rowlands and the family did not realise the extent Rowlands abused and tried to control Lauren.

In the early days of the relationship, Lauren started dressing like Rowlands and shaved her hair off. She would wear Rowlands' clothes and stopped wearing make-up.

Lauren moved to Cardiff with Madog Rowlands when he went to university

Her distraught mum and their grieving family want to mark Lauren's 24 birthday on Friday by raising awareness of abusive relationships.

"Lauren had always been so independent growing up," said Alisha, 25.

"She would do whatever she wanted whenever she wanted with whoever she wanted but she became less independent. It kind of became the Madog show.

"She was just doing things with him and wouldn't do things unless he was there. It seemed a little bit toxic from the outside, she wouldn't be able to go anywhere without him."

Lauren had been described as "super bubbly" and the "best friend you could have"

She said Rowlands appeared to control Lauren's finances and whenever anyone gave her money, Rowlands would take it and put it in his pocket.

Before Rowlands' murder trial in 2020, Lauren's family were shown police bodycam footage after he assaulted her at their flat in Cathays, a popular student area of Cardiff, in 2018.

"She [Lauren] told the police that she didn't want to die.. she looked so vulnerable and like a little kid," said Alisha.

"He was brainwashing her into thinking that she had the same ideas as him and she didn't."

Lauren's sister Alisha and mum Alison want to raise awareness of the impact of domestic abuse

The circumstances surrounding Lauren's death are being investigated by the Independent Domestic Homicide Review and South Wales Police said it would "commit to any learning that arises".

"Our thoughts remain with Lauren's family and friends," the force said in a statement.

"Tackling violence and abuse against women and girls is a long-standing priority for South Wales Police and we recognise that concern regarding personal safety and violence is as great as it has ever been.

"We are determined to provide the best possible service to victims and pursue perpetrators at every opportunity."

Her mum said Lauren was a popular girl at school

Lauren's mum and a sister are running in March to raise awareness and money for women and children who are affected by domestic violence.

"If one person is telling you you don't mean everything, you do," said Alison, 48.

"You mean everything to someone."

Information and support on domestic abuse

If you're affected by any of the issues in this article you can find details of organisations who can help via the BBC Action Line.

If you feel you are in immediate danger, call the police on 999. If you can't speak, press 55 when prompted to let them know you need urgent help.

Online webchats and text services are also available.

• For more on this story, watch BBC Wales Live on BBC One Wales on Wednesday at 22:30 GMT or catch-up on BBC iPlayer