FA Cup 2021-22: Hartlepool boss Graeme Lee on his wife's devastating brain tumour diagnosis

Graeme Lee was appointed Hartlepool United boss in December - 26 years after making his debut for the club aged 17

If Graeme Lee is looking for someone to deliver a powerful motivational speech about courage and bravery to his Hartlepool United players before Saturday's daunting FA Cup tie, he will not have far to look.

League Two Hartlepool are one victory from reaching the fifth round for the first time, although they will have to win away at Premier League Crystal Palace if they are to make club history.

It is a huge weekend for a club that has not had much to cheer about over the years, and nearly 5,000 fans are making the journey from the north east to south London - including Lee's wife, Gemma.

It is a weekend Gemma, 41, did not think she would see after she was told she had 12 months to live in 2019 following a cancerous brain tumour diagnosis.

"We were in total disbelief when we heard that," Hartlepool boss Lee tells BBC Sport.

Gemma refused to accept her fate and the couple started an exhaustive search for alternative treatments.

Despite her diagnosis, the mother-of-two is alive thanks to a £5,000-a-month trial drug from abroad.

As Hartlepool get ready to face Palace, Lee opens up about his wife's incredible spirit, resilience and determination to carry on against the odds.

"She's an absolute warrior," he adds.

Gemma and Graeme with their two children Grayson, nine, (second right) and six-year-old Hadley

'We have gone through hell'

Fit and health conscious Gemma could not have envisaged the frightening months ahead after running a half marathon in 2018 to help raise funds for a friend who had been in an accident.

"She came back from the run feeling a bit strange," recalls Lee, a former Hartlepool, Sheffield Wednesday and Doncaster Rovers defender.

"Her eyes were hazy and over time she started feeling very tired. If you didn't wake her up, she wouldn't wake up. We went from seeing eye doctors to having a scan and then things really escalated.

"The news just kept getting worse."

Gemma underwent a brain biopsy but the tumour could not be operated on. Intensive courses of chemotherapy and radiotherapy both failed to shrink the tumour.

In 2019 a Macmillan nurse arrived at the family home to arrange a visit to the local hospice and talk about palliative care, while the couple talked about doing a memory box for their children, son Grayson, nine, and six-year-old daughter Hadley.

At this time Lee was given permanent leave by Middlesbrough, where he was under-23s coach.

He researched alternative treatments and learned about a new drug called ONC201 available in Germany, which was in a trial phase.

"We phoned what felt like every hospital around the world regarding trials and alternative treatments," adds Lee. "One kept popping up."

The couple, who met 23 years ago and have been married since 2010, believe ONC201 has worked, with Gemma's most recent scans classed as 'stable', which means the cancer has not got any worse.

And after everything they have been through, stable is positive.

Supported in part by fundraisers at several of Lee's former clubs - he also played for Bradford City and Notts County - they have been overwhelmed by donations towards Gemma's treatment.

A clothing line has been established where all profits go towards paying for treatment while Doncaster - who Lee scored the winner for in the 2007 EFL Trophy final at the Millennium Stadium - donated £10 from every home shirt sale towards the cause.

The fund-raising continues and the couple are carrying on with life between scans.

"£5,000 a month is a heck of a lot of money," adds Lee.

"At times you are trying to add up where you are with it and how much you have got. We've had some amazing people - not just close family - who have heard about Gemma's story and donated.

"We have all gone through hell but there have been incredible gestures from people we have never met. These people have helped keep Gemma alive."

Graeme and Grayson celebrate on the pitch after Hartlepool knock Championship side Blackpool out of the FA Cup on 8 January

Staying positive and embracing life

Gemma remains terminally ill. Her brain tumour is grade four, as severe as it gets. And it's not going away.

She has thrown herself into raising awareness and funds. Gemma writes a 365 blog (in recognition of how many days she was given to live), detailing her life with a terminal illness.

While she has bad days, she is trying to stay positive and embracing life with her husband and their children.

On the morning of this interview, the couple have been on a three-mile walk at the foot of the Cleveland Hills.

"We've had many blips along the way but at this moment things are stable which has allowed us to live our lives again," adds Lee.

"Gemma's still living with a brain tumour. It's never going to go away. We just have to try and manage it."

4,700 Hartlepool fans are making the 480-mile round trip to support their team at Crystal Palace in the FA Cup

'Friends for life'

Gemma will be at Crystal Palace on Saturday supporting her husband and his team along with 4,700 Hartlepool fans - some of whom queued from 6am when tickets first went on sale.

Lee described his appointment as a "dream come true" when Hartlepool named him manager in December 2021 - 26 years after he made his debut for the club as a 17-year-old substitute in a League Cup tie against Arsenal at Highbury.

"I made friends for life when I played here," adds the veteran of more than 200 league appearances for Pools.

His first game in charge was a 1-0 win at League One Lincoln City in the second round of the FA Cup. In the last round, Hartlepool fought back from 1-0 down to knockout Championship club Blackpool.

One special person in Lee's life who is unable to make the journey to Selhurst Park is his 74-year-old father, Tony.

A well-known figure in non-league managerial circles in the Northern League in the 80s and 90s, Tony guided both Whitby Town to the second round of the FA Cup and Billingham Synthonia to the first round.

"Unfortunately he's had dementia for a few years," says Lee.

"It's quite advanced. It's sad because he questions why I'm not playing.

"As a kid, I went with him to watch his teams and there were some fantastic FA Cup runs. There was a second round tie at Wigan's old Springfield Park when he was managing Whitby.

"I know how proud dad would be to know the role I'm in now."

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