Boys learn ways to combat toxic masculinity

Boys in school uniform sit in a classroom. They are listening to, and looking at, an unseen speaker.
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Boys at Debenham High School in Suffolk have been having lessons aimed at combating toxic masculinity

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Teenagers are being taught that they do not have to conform to dangerous stereotypes about masculinity they see online.

Boys studying at Debenham High School in Suffolk were visited by Paul Clark from Progressive Masculinity, external, which has been working to reshape the idea of masculinity for boys and men.

Figures show that young men are three times more likely to take their own lives, external than their female peers.

One of the reasons is thought to be that boys are conditioned to not show their emotions.

Mr Clark said: "We are really happy to broaden the boys' views of what it means to be a real man, so they don't feel that they have to conform to this stereotype which is very exclusionary in its nature."

Paul Clark has short ginger-blond hair. He is looking slightly off-camera and wearing a white open-necked shirt. Behind him is a board with various rectangular luminous pieces of paper arranged vertically and horizontally. Each has words written on but they are blurred and not legible.
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Paul Clark said boys often hid their emotions and did not want to be seen crying

He told BBC Politics East: "Most men don't fit into this stereotype of what it means to be a real man: to be physical, to be aggressive and to be dominant.

"We try to show that men can show strength in other ways so they can be empathetic and it's just to broaden the horizons of the boys to show that, 'Yes, I can show strength in a different way.'

"It's always really lifting from my point of view to see they do all show emotions. The problem they have got is they feel that they have to hide it."

He remembered one boy who said he had cried, but without anyone seeing him.

"When I asked him where he cried... he revealed he had cried in the shower because the water was hot and makes his face look flushed and so nobody knows he had been crying," he said.

"I thought it was so sad that boys go to such lengths to hide their emotions just to fit in with the pack."

Paul Clark, in white shirt and black trousers, addresses a group of teenage boys in a classroom. The boys are wearing school uniform and their chairs are arranged in a semi-circle.
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In the session, boys discussed what it meant to be a man

One of the Debenham pupils, Tom, said it was sometimes difficult to show emotions.

"I think it's scary to admit something and you really don't know what people are going to think of you," he said.

Another boy, Tommy, said he had suffered from cyber bullying at primary school.

"I was struggling about who I was but now I know and that has helped me out," he said.

Stuart Trevorrow, head of Year 10 at Debenham High School, said: "I think it is really important that we are making the best future possible for young people.

"It is very important to show how society could be in the future and these are the people who are going to make the future."

Sarah Owen MP looks directly at the camera. She has long dark hair, red lipstick and is wearing a black and mauve patterned blouse. Behind her is a plain grey backdrop.Image source, UK Parliament
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Labour MP Sarah Owen said teaching boys about the dangers of stereotypes of masculinity was vital

Sarah Owen, Labour MP for Luton North and chair of the House of Commons Women and Equalities Committee, told BBC Politics East it was vital to support such programmes in schools.

"I think we need to give tools to the pupils of today to ensure that they know when they are being exploited and when they are being exposed to harmful contact and we need platforms, especially search engines, to play their part," she said.

"For young boys, there have to be positive role models. On my committee last week for [International] Women's Day we had a whole panel of men talking about the importance of fathers involved in their children's lives and the need for shared parental leave."

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BBC Politics East was broadcast on Sunday, 16 March and can be seen on BBC iPlayer.

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