'Common sense' pledge to families over grave rules

The council says it will be clearing five council-owned cemeteries, starting with Chilwell

The leader of a Nottinghamshire council has promised grieving families a “common sense” approach will be worked out over controversial cemetery tribute rules.

Families involved in a petition to overturn restrictions around grave memorabilia spoke to Broxtowe Borough Council's Milan Radulovic following a meeting at Bramcote Crematorium on Thursday night (October 24).

It was launched in response to the council’s cabinet decision in July to restrict grave tribute items.

The authority says the restrictions are based on maintenance difficulties and health and safety reasons, and rules had always been in place.

Chilwell Cemetery is the first of five borough-owned cemeteries to receive a deadline of January 23 for when “unofficial surrounds” will be cleared from graves, reported the Local Democracy Reporting Service.

After this date, maintenance teams will remove and dispose of any decorations, ornaments or tributes from people’s resting places.

Radulovic spoke to the families after a Bramcote Bereavement Services Joint Committee Meeting, a routine meeting held at the crematorium.

Among them was Lindsey Collins, whose son Josh Collins died in 2021 at the age of 19 and is buried in Beeston Cemetery.

She presented the Bramcote Bereavement Service’s updated "Notice of Interment" form - a form she says is different to the one she signed a few years prior.

Families discovered notices placed around Chilwell Cemetery and on some individual graves earlier this month

The 2023 form reads that “no item of whatever description is allowed to be placed upon the actual grave space in the lawn and cremated remains area”.

The form states this includes fencing, kerbing, bedding plants, vases, windmills, gravel, glass or alcohol and that these will be removed and disposed of immediately.

She said: "I don’t understand how the council could change the rules because they’ve always accepted this – had I known this wasn’t acceptable I wouldn’t have buried my son [there].”

Radulovic said: "There has been a trend over the last few years of putting some things that I think violate the consecrated ground.

“We’re not saying to people that they can’t put personal things on there, the intention is to be respectful of not just your grave, but all graves- what we’re saying is use your common sense.”

The families asked for more communication between the council, the bereavement services department and families involved to form an arrangement.

Radulovic said: "Come and see me and we will sit round a table.

"We do an awful lot of respectful stuff on behalf of people - I defend our staff here – they have tried to interpret the law and rules as laid down to us – but we do have the power to vary that.

"You’ve got a blanket piece of legislation regarding health and safety that’s completely unworkable."