Teen football referee quit over abuse from parents

Luca Sinclair said he would only consider returning to refereeing if parents were banned from spectating

A teenage referee said he felt "forced" to quit officiating grassroots football due to the abuse he received from players' parents.

Luca Sinclair, 18, from Lowestoft, Suffolk, started refereeing at age 14, the youngest age at which a person can become a match official.

He said he finally decided to stop refereeing last year when a player's mother invaded the pitch midway through a match and called him names.

Suffolk County Football Association (FA) said it was committed to tackling and stamping out poor behaviour across the grassroots game.

Describing the incident that led him to quit, he said: "I felt quite scared. She kept shouting at me, saying I was blind."

Mr Sinclair said he reported the issues to host club Kirkley and Pakefield and Suffolk County FA directly.

The FA's most recent Grassroots Disciplinary Review showed serious abuse and physical assaults on match officials had risen by about 17% in one year, from 1,451 to 1,716 in the 2023/2024 season.

Jemma Sinclair said people need to remember that without referees, there would be no games

Mr Sinclair said he felt people did not take into consideration his age when he was officiating.

"It's not fair to verbally abuse someone a lot younger than you. There was a lot of name-calling and slurs," he said.

He said he felt the atmosphere could change at tournaments if they got "rid of the parents" and added: "It's the only way I'd consider coming back."

Mr Sinclair's mum, Jemma Sinclair, attended matches with him at the start of his career to help him deal with the abuse.

"It made me angry watching him being treated this way," she said.

"There were times I had to intervene with other parents to remind them that the referee is a child too.

"You wouldn't abuse a child walking down the street or playing on the swing the wrong way, so why shout at a child trying to help your [child] play football?"

A spokesperson for Suffolk County FA said: "We cannot comment on individual cases but all incidents of reported misconduct, including abuse of referees, are thoroughly investigated and appropriate action taken.

"Tackling and stamping out poor behaviour across the grassroots game continues to be a key focus of the county FA."

Henry and Alex, both 16, have been refereeing for nearly three years and said they had experienced abuse from match spectators.

"It's mainly the parents who give the abuse and try to influence the game," Henry said.

The pair added they dealt with the behaviour by "keeping calm and trying to get their authority across".

"There have been a few incidents that have nearly made me quit, but you just grow a thick skin and get on with it really," Alex said.

Steve Oakey, chairman of the Referees' Association, said: "We are continually dealing with reports of referees being attacked and abused.

"In the last three incidences… one included a 14-year-old referee being abused and then chased by the mother of an eight-year-old player at a youth tournament."

Alex said it was "not a nice feeling" when people shouted at him during games

Kevin Fryer, youth chairman of Kirkley and Pakefield Football Club, has worked with young referees but said "people forget the games are just a bit of fun".

He recalled one under-11 girls' match was abandoned after the "parents were abusing the referee to an extent he felt he couldn't continue".

"We've had referees reduced to tears, parents waiting in car parks for referees under 16 - it's just crazy," he said.

Mr Fryer said his club offered training courses to referees on how to deal with abuse on the pitch, and there was also a "system to show it's a newly qualified referee" on the pitch.

"It should be about kids having fun, but people take it way too seriously," he told the BBC.

Mr Fryer said the club had established a system to show spectators if a referee was newly qualified

The club has a "respect line" - a painted pitch border at lower-level games and a physical barrier for the first team games - which spectators have to stand behind.

It was hoped this would help reduce the abuse suffered by amateur referees and young players.

Some parents at Kirkley and Pakefield said they understood that other parents were passionate, but they should also be mindful.

One said: "You do see parents forget the referees are children themselves sometimes."

Another added: "They've got to start somewhere, and we need to, as parents, set an example."

On its England Football website, the FA said playing the game at this age was about "being part of a team and understanding gameplay".

A FA spokesperson added: "Everyone should be able to enjoy the game, including young match officials just starting out."