BBC Homepage
  • Skip to content
  • Accessibility Help
  • Your account
  • Notifications
  • Home
  • News
  • Sport
  • Weather
  • iPlayer
  • Sounds
  • Bitesize
  • CBBC
  • CBeebies
  • Food
  • More menu
More menu
Search BBC
  • Home
  • News
  • Sport
  • Weather
  • iPlayer
  • Sounds
  • Bitesize
  • CBBC
  • CBeebies
  • Food
Close menu
BBC News
Menu
  • Home
  • InDepth
  • Israel-Gaza war
  • War in Ukraine
  • Climate
  • UK
  • World
  • Business
  • Politics
  • Culture
More
  • Tech
  • Science
  • Health
  • Family & Education
  • In Pictures
  • Newsbeat
  • BBC Verify
  • Disability
  • Trending

Coming out as gay at Chinese New Year

  • Published
    23 February 2015
Share page
About sharing
Fang Chao tells his mother he's gay in the PFLAG film Coming HomeImage source, Ah Qiang/PFLAG
By BBC Trending
What's popular and why

How did a video about telling your parents you're gay at Chinese New Year become a viral hit in China?

New Year is a time for millions of Chinese families to come together to eat, celebrate and set off firecrackers. For many Chinese sons and daughters, it's also a time to endure a barrage of questions from parents demanding to know when they're ever going to meet someone and settle down (many have been there).

This spring festival there's a chance they may also be discussing homosexuality thanks to a film called Coming Home, external, about a man named Fang Chao, who goes home for New Year and tells his family he's gay.

Coming Home dinner table sceneImage source, Ah Qiang/ PFLAG

As BBC Trending radio has been finding out, the film has racked up more than 100 million views on QQ, one of the biggest social media platforms in China. In the film Fang's parents disown him for two years after he tells them he wants to be with a man. At the end there are real clips from the mothers of gay men offering their advice, and leaving messages like: "Share the story of your life with your parents - they're willing to hear you out," and "Don't allow social convention and traditional views on marriage get in the way of your kid coming home."

Attitudes towards homosexuality in China are mixed and the comments reacting to the video reflect this. Some have been overwhelmingly supportive, others less so. "Some say gays and lesbians are OK and normal. What will you think if YOUR sons and daughters are?," one comment read. "Are they afraid to socialise with women? Can they differentiate fraternal relations from love?" another said.

Coming Home title credits with messages from real parents to LGBT peopleImage source, Ah qiang/PFLAG

One of those behind the video is Ah Qiang, who runs the Guangzhou branch of the not-for-profit organization PFLAG. It began in the US and campaigns for the social inclusion of all people based on their sexual orientation, gender identity, and gender expression.

Ah Qiang told BBC Trending his coming out story. "My mother died in 2006 and I never got the chance to tell her. [I'm] very sad about that," he says. Two years later he decided to tell his father and stepmother he was gay. He invited them over, explained why he had no girlfriend and why he did not come home for New Year. "At the end I said 'have you got any questions for me?' [My father] had just one. 'Who will look after you when you are old?'

"I said, 'I will have friends and I am saving for my old age'."

Coming Home telephone sceneImage source, Ah Qiang/PFLAG

Despite China's policy of internet censorship, Ah Qiang says social media has given people in China an outlet to discuss issues around homosexuality.

He told BBC Trending that QQ, the Chinese social media site that hosted the Coming Home video, initially said they couldn't put it on the front page because of its pro-gay message.

After a few days however, it had proved so popular it was moved to the site's front page.

To hear the full interview with Ah Qiang check out the BBC Trending podcast.

Blog by Gemma Newby and India Rakusen

Next story: Be careful who you swear at on the train

Or maybe you'd like to watch: Celebrities defend gay rights in Ghana

You can follow BBC Trending on Twitter @BBCtrending, external. All our stories are at bbc.com/trending

More on this story

  • Celebrities defend gay rights in Ghana. Video, 00:02:43Celebrities defend gay rights in Ghana

    • Published
      19 February 2015
    2:43
    Efya promotional picture
  • How difficult is it to come out of the closet in Colombia?

    • Published
      8 December 2014
    Juan Pablo Jaramillo

Top stories

  • Aid group says worker killed by Israeli military in attack on Gaza HQ

    • Published
      2 hours ago
  • Amber warning issued ahead of Storm Floris

    • Published
      2 hours ago
  • Ukraine drone attack sparks fire at Sochi oil depot, Russian authorities say

    • Published
      5 hours ago

More to explore

  • Attenborough gives 'family feels' in new show Parenthood

    A father lion patiently playing with his young cub
  • Their children can't eat, speak or walk - so forgotten Zika mothers raise them together

    Mum and son with congenital Zika syndrome
  • Tan lines. Once hidden, now sought after, but can they make a safe comeback?

    Tan lines on a woman's back
  • The mystery of Winston Churchill's dead platypus was unsolved - until now

    A pair of hands hold a curled-up baby platypus
  • What to do if your planned holiday destination is affected by wildfires

    Wildfires seen in July in Chalkida on the Greek island of Euboea
  • Shapewear for your face while you sleep. Has Kim Kardashian taken it too far?

    Two women wearing a face wrap that goes under their chins to the top of their heads
  • Love Island finale, and Wednesday returns: What’s coming up this week?

    A composite image of Maya Jama and the Wednesday Adams character
  • 'Thank you, but it's too late': Why some Palestinians aren't convinced by Starmer's promise

    Jerusalem scene with Jeremy Bowen in the foreground
  • Summer Essential: Your family’s guide to the summer, delivered to your inbox every Tuesday

    concentric circles ranging from orange to yellow to represent the sun, with a blue sky background
loading elsewhere stories

Most read

  1. 1

    Amber warning issued ahead of Storm Floris

  2. 2

    BBC launches investigation into Strictly 'drug use'

  3. 3

    Mum's 'brutal' murder still a mystery 20 years on

  4. 4

    The mystery of Winston Churchill's dead platypus was unsolved - until now

  5. 5

    Russian volcano erupts for first time in more than 500 years

  6. 6

    Crackdown on Channel crossing social media adverts

  7. 7

    Tan lines. Once hidden, now sought after, but can they make a safe comeback?

  8. 8

    Ukraine drone attack sparks fire at Sochi oil depot, Russian authorities say

  9. 9

    Teenager arrested at airport after fatal stabbing

  10. 10

    Their children can't eat, speak or walk - so forgotten Zika mothers raise them together

BBC News Services

  • On your mobile
  • On smart speakers
  • Get news alerts
  • Contact BBC News

Best of the BBC

  • A new disappearance reopens old wounds

    • Attribution
      iPlayer
    The Gone
  • Inside DOOM, the controversial 90s game

    • Attribution
      Sounds
    Witness History: The Release of DOOM
  • A classic, nostalgic time-travel adventure

    • Attribution
      iPlayer
    Back to the Future
  • What do your dreams say about you?

    • Attribution
      Sounds
    The Dream Team with Vinny and Cate
  • Home
  • News
  • Sport
  • Weather
  • iPlayer
  • Sounds
  • Bitesize
  • CBBC
  • CBeebies
  • Food
  • Terms of Use
  • About the BBC
  • Privacy Policy
  • Cookies
  • Accessibility Help
  • Parental Guidance
  • Contact the BBC
  • Make an editorial complaint
  • BBC emails for you

Copyright © 2025 BBC. The BBC is not responsible for the content of external sites. Read about our approach to external linking.