On a serious note, Ukraine's president Petro Poroshenko has said he had to cancel his appearance at the final due to a shelling attack in the east.

The fighting took place in the eastern frontline town of Avdiivka.

"I planned to be at the contest final with [my wife] Marina and invited our fighters and people with disabilities to support Ukraine," he said.  

"However due to the shelling of Avdiivka and the death of peaceful civilians, I took a decision to cancel my presence at the Eurovision final."

Neil Smith
Entertainment reporter

Image source, Getty Images

Thought Italy's dancing ape was bananas? Well, Azerbaijan have a man up a ladder in a horse's head.

Why? According to singer Dihaj - real name Diana Hajiyeva - the ladder is a physical representation of the distance between people (and maybe horses too for that matter) who are in a failing relationship.

We don't mean to nag or to be a neigh-sayer, but that sounds like a lame idea to saddle us with and raises more equestrians than answers.

She also has the rather disconcerting habit of flapping her coat open and shut like a flasher.

Skeletons, by the way, is described as experimental "Doom Pop" - which should on no account be confused with this...

Neil Smith
Entertainment reporter

Image source, Getty Images

Italy's biggest competition comes from Portugal, who have bucked convention by sending a charming little love song - in Portuguese no less - to this year's contest.

Amar Pelos Dois is sung by Salvador Sobral, a performer you could easily mistake for a mature student or hipster barista who'd wandered onto the island stage by mistake.

It was touch and go whether Sobral would make it to Kiev at all. The 27-year-old has a serious heart condition and only recently had double hernia surgery.

Portugal have never won Eurovision and have never ended inside the top five. Expect at least one of those stats to change by the end of the evening.

Neil Smith
Entertainment reporter

Image source, Getty Images

Anja Nissen was born in Australia. She was raised in Australia. In 2014 she won the Australian version of The Voice.

But she has Danish parents, which is apparently enough to see her represent Denmark at Eurovision.

Anja belts out Where I Am as if her life (or maybe her return ticket to Sydney?) depends on it.

The song, alas, sounds like a Mariah Carey B-side - though that didn't stop this couple cheering her on during Thursday's semi-final.

Neil Smith
Entertainment reporter, Kiev

Image source, Getty Images

We're nine songs in but we've yet to see one likely to win the competition. But that-a is about-a change.

Italy entered this year's contest as odds-on favourite, and while there's been some fluctuations since there's every chance Francesco Gabbani will still be crowned champion later.

His song, Occidentali's Karma, has everything: a catchy chorus, an easily imitated dance routine... oh, and a dancer in a gorilla costume.

Vibrant visuals showing hennaed hands and dancing apes add to the fun of a song we guarantee you'll be humming tomorrow.

Neil Smith
Entertainment reporter, Kiev

Image source, UA:PBC/EBU

The Eurovision slogan this year is "Celebrate Diversity". From the look of this year's finalists so far, you'd have thought #EurovisionSoWhite would have been more appropriate.

Thanks to Hungary, though, there's at least a little diversity to celebrate. Joci Papai is of Romani descent and proudly describes himself as the first gypsy to represent his country at the contest.

Origo begins as a lament, segues into pop and has a rap break in the middle. It also comes with a violinist, a dancer and plumes of flame.

It is, in short, one of the most (musically) diverse tracks in this year's final - which is why I predicted it would get there on Thursday.

We've just heard The Netherlands' OG3NE perform Lights and Shadows. Sound familiar?

Neil Smith
Entertainment reporter, Kiev

Moldova have never won Eurovision and didn't qualify for the last three contests. But they have this year, partly by bringing back the "Epic Sax Guy" who became an internet celebrity after his performance in 2010.

Sergey Stepanov, though, is just one third of Sunstroke Project, a male trio who've taken on three female backing singers since the last time we saw them.

Image source, Getty Images

Hey Mamma is a funky, jazzy, poppy delight and comes with one of the costume coups of this year's competition.

We won't reveal too much, apart from saying that the band's stated aim to "create a small wedding on stage" is no idle boast.

The lovely Graham Norton has just announced the UK flag has fallen off the wall in the commentary room.

"I hope it's not a bad omen," he says. So do we!

If you fancy being a Eurovision judge for the night, now's your chance.

You can download a scorecard on the BBC Eurovision site, which will let you score each song based on tune, performance and staging.

In fact, there's a whole party pack if you want it as well! 

Neil Smith
Entertainment reporter, Kiev

Image source, Getty Images

It's very much a family affair from The Netherlands this year. OG3NE are made up of three sisters, two of them twins, while their song was written by their father and one of the sisters' boyfriends.

Not only that, but their name - pronounced "Oh Jean", which is what my Dad says when Mum burns the toast - is a shout-out both to their mother Isolde’s blood type and the genes that tie them all together.

The trio's smooth Nashville sound saw them become the first group to win the Dutch version of The Voice. Not everyone in their homeland is impressed, though.

"Lights and Shadows is a good song but it's not new," Dutch commentator Cornald Maas told me when we spoke recently. “It reminds me of Wilson Phillips."

What do you think?

BBC Monitoring
News from around the globe

In Russia, major TV channels have completely ignored today's final. There has been literally no mention of it on the two state-controlled TV stations - Rossiya 1 and Channel One - throughout the day.

Surprisingly, Eurovision has not yet made it to the top Twitter trends in the country either, despite having been widely discussed during the semi-finals.

Neil Smith
Entertainment reporter, Kiev

The most impressive ponytail at Eurovision this year unquestionably belonged to Slavko Kalezic from Montenegro.

An epic, serpentine man-braid, he'd whip that thing around like he was auditioning to play Indiana Jones.

Image source, Getty Images

With Slavko sadly knocked out on Tuesday, though, it's left to Artsvik Harutyunyan from Armenia to provide the ponytail action.

After a slow beginning, Fly With Me builds to quite the dramatic crescendo. It also has a well-drilled pair of female dancers whose arm choreography (armography?) is a sight to behold.

Image source, Getty Images

Here's a quick snapshot of what you've been saying:

Neil Smith
Entertainment reporter, Kiev

Image source, Getty Images

Belarus had a boat. Austria has a moon. All we need is an owl and a pussycat and we’ve got ourselves a poem, external.

Austria have a chequered history at Eurovision. Winners in 1966, they struggled to qualify after semi-finals were introduced in 2004.

But then "bearded lady" Conchita Wurst came along to not just claim victory in 2014 but also give the contest one of its great iconic figures.

Image source, Getty Images

Running On Air is no Rise Like a Phoenix, external, but it's a perfectable serviceable pop tune that Nathan Trent sings perfectly serviceably.

Nathan Trent, by the way, isn’t his real name. He’s really Nathanaele Koll, he comes from Innsbruck and he turned 25 last month.

Neil Smith
Entertainment reporter, Kiev

Image source, Getty Images

Kiev, the location of this year's contest, is bisected by the vast Dnipro river that winds its way through central Ukraine before reaching the Black Sea.

It also flows through Belarus, which might explain why Artem Lukyanenko and Ksenia Zhuk of Naviband have chosen to perform on a boat.

Story of My Life is the first entry from Belarus to be performed in Belarussian and comes with a hollered refrain that's the definition of infectious.

Then again, there might have been another reason why this folk-indie duo made it through Tuesday’s semi-final.

Neil Smith
Entertainment reporter, Kiev

Image source, Getty Images

Polish singer Kasia Mos is the daughter of a conductor - the musical kind, that is, as opposed to the bus or train variety.

She's also appeared in a Pussycat Dolls burlesque show and has made two previous attempts to represent her homeland at Eurovision.

Like Imri before her, Mos has made it into the spotlight on the third time of asking with Flashlight, a Bond-style power ballad she's stylishly twinned with an off-the-shoulder white gown slashed to the thigh.

History is against her though. No song given the second place in the running order has ever gone on to win the competition.

Neil Smith
Entertainment reporter, Kiev

Image source, Getty Images

He may be only 25, but Israel's Imri Ziv is a Eurovision veteran who already has two contests under his belt.

In 2015 he danced behind Nadav Guedj on Golden Boy, and he was back the next year to provide backing vocals for Hovi Star's Made of Stars.

Persistence has clearly paid off for Israel’s most promising Lee Ryan-alike, who - when he's not singing, body-building and winking at the camera - is studying for a BA in Visual Communications.

He is also partly of Ukrainian descent, which might endear some of the home crowd to his energetic dance anthem I Feel Alive with its klezmer groove.

It's certainly a lively way to start the competitive portion of the evening's festivities. Whether the voting public will remember it 25 songs from now remains to be seen.

In case you missed it, this year there was a controversy with Russia missing from the contest.

For the first time in Eurovision history, the host nation - Ukraine - barred another country's singer.

Steve Rosenberg in Kiev explains why.

Image source, EPA