Coercive control: Ruth Dodsworth's 'new chapter' as abusive ex leaves prison

Ruth Dodsworth hopes to inspire other domestic abuse victims to seek help

A television presenter whose abusive ex-husband was due for prison release this week has said it marks the "start of a whole new chapter" of her life.

Jonathan Wignall was sentenced to three years for stalking and coercive and controlling behaviour.

Ms Dodsworth said not knowing when or where he would be released was "tough".

She said her life now was a "world away" from the fear she lived with for decades.

"Those scary things, those demons, those monsters every day become less and less of an issue. I wake up every morning... and I think today is going to be a really good day," she said.

It took Ms Dodsworth years to recognise she was being abused by her husband of almost 18 years.

"It nearly destroyed me," she told BBC Radio Wales Breakfast on Thursday. "But I'm still alive and I'm still well and I have that story to tell."

While she said she understood the need to protect ex-offenders, the uncertainty "heightens that sense of looking over your shoulder".

"We don't quite know when. We don't quite know where," she said. "Wondering where on earth he actually is. It is tough. There is no doubt about it."

• Coercive control: Ruth Dodsworth speaks of 'double life'

• Presenter 'overwhelmed' by domestic abuse messages

'Domestic abuse takes its toll in so many ways'

After her ex-husband was jailed, the ITV Wales presenter explained that he used to call her up to 200 times a day, demand she left work to eat lunch with him and delete contacts from her phone.

"Domestic abuse takes its toll in so many ways and it's not just bruises," she said on Thursday.

"The 20 years of fear and walking on eggshells and nerves just shows. You can't hide that with make-up."

Nonetheless, life is "really good", right now, said Ms Dodsworth, who has since remarried.

"We deal with the day to day hardships, the worry, the fear, but it's a world away and it's a world better than the fear and the worry that I was living with for almost 20 years," she said.

Her story going public has given others the opportunity to spot any red flags, she says, and she is continuing to urge people to speak out.

"I've got a duty to the people who've contacted me and shared their stories with me to keep this conversation going.

"It's making that next person realise that they're not the only ones being subjected to this behaviour."

Recognising the signs of controlling behaviour

During the trial, Ms Dodsworth's ex-husband was said to have called his wife "incessantly" and opened her mail.

Cardiff Crown Court also heard he would stand outside the door as she used the bathroom.

The court heard Jonathan Wignall was an "unrepentant, possessive bully"

"Living in an abusive relationship makes you feel as dehumanised as it's possible to get. It's embarrassing. It's humiliating," Ms Dodsworth said.

"To suddenly admit that to yourself and then to someone else is possibly one of the hardest things to do. And that's why so many people stay in these abusive relationships."

Work became her coping mechanism, she said.

"That environment becomes your safe zone... to almost create this very false, fake world of happiness. It couldn't have been further from the truth."

Ms Dodsworth said she did not know what coercive control was and said she had simply learnt to "kid herself" that things were ok, "because we want things to be ok".

"It's the only way you can survive, by putting up barriers," she said. "So many people are so very good at putting on a brave face... it's exhausting."

But she said it was important for anyone who recognised any of the signs of coercive and controlling behaviour to seek help.

"Unless you get out of that relationship it will only end badly, it will only go one way... my own children said: He will kill you."

• Information and support about this issue is available on the BBC Action Line site: Information and Support - Domestic Abuse