Emma Hayes: Chelsea boss says 'you can't meet aggression with aggression'
- Published
Hayes recites poem in news conference
Chelsea manager Emma Hayes said "you cannot meet aggression with aggression" regarding her clash with Arsenal boss Jonas Eidevall at last month's Women's League Cup final.
Hayes appeared to push away Eidevall at the end of Chelsea's 1-0 defeat and later accused him of "male aggression".
Eidevall said the incident cast a "dark shadow" and denied his players "the spotlight they deserved".
Hayes used an analogy with her son, and a poem, to explain her feelings now.
The Chelsea manager said: "My son said to me after the game: 'Mummy, when you push someone in school you're asked to go and take time out.'
"I said to him: 'Do you know what darling? You can't meet aggression with aggression, all you can do is tell the teacher. All you can do is go and explain to the teacher why you think something is unfair.'
"You cannot meet aggression with aggression. I thought it was a really good conversation to have with my son after the final."
Having had time to reflect on the final during the international break, Hayes said that there were "lessons learned" - although she did not comment in detail.
Asked if she had any regrets over her own actions, or what was said, Hayes quoted Robert Frost's Choose Something Like A Star poem.
"When at times the mob is swayed, to carry praise or blame too far, we may choose something like a star, to stay our minds on and be staid," Hayes said.
Elaborating on that, she added: "I've had a fantastic break, I've already explained an important analogy that I shared with my son and the lessons learned. My focus is on moving forward and I've had time to look at my star.
"I can only control my own behaviours. I've reflected on that and next time I need to listen to my son's advice and go to my teacher if I have anything to say.
"I'll lean on lots of things, not just poetry. I've got different mentors, different spiritual leaders, a great family. Being in my position is not easy so I need to keep my sanity. I'm grateful that things like that help."
Arsenal 1-0 Chelsea: Emma Hayes and Jonas Eidevall clash at final whistle
Hayes will face no action after appearing to shove Eidevall, who called his Chelsea counterpart's comment regarding male aggression "irresponsible".
Discussing the events in Friday's pre-match news conference, Eidevall said the fallout with Hayes at the end of the game at Molineux on 31 March was "a real pity".
"It was obviously such a nice moment for both the team and the club to win the second trophy in two consecutive seasons and in the way that we did it with players performances I thought was incredible," said the Arsenal boss.
"You have a player like Laia Codina, on at half-time, she basically doesn't put a foot wrong in the whole game. She had a massive part.
"You have a player like Manuela Zinsberger that pulls off an amazing save in the 85th minute that keeps us in the game and gives us the opportunity to win it.
"Lotte Wubben-Moy, a rock in the defending line for 120 minutes. Arsenal through and through. There are so many of these individual stories and I thought they performed at a really high level.
"If there is only one thing that I think had some dark shadow over that game it is that they didn't get fully in the spotlight they deserved."
'Everything is looking good' for Maanum
Frida Maanum has been fitted with a device to monitor her heart after collapsing during the Women's League Cup final
Emotions were running high at Molineux after Arsenal midfielder Frida Maanum collapsed during the final.
Play was stopped for seven minutes, but the Norway international did not need to go to hospital and travelled home with her team-mates.
The Gunners say tests showed "no obvious cardiac causes" and Eidevall said while Maanum will miss Sunday's Women's Super League match against Bristol City, she could return for next week's game against Leicester.
"Everything is looking good, that's the most important thing," Eidevall added.
"She's on a graduated monitor protocol here to return to playing. She will not be available for selection for Sunday but after that, everything else as planned, it looks promising for her to be available to play.
"We're not going to disclose any medical findings and not here publicly. But what I can assure you of is the support around Frida has been phenomenal.
"The monitoring and protocols and the testing have been on the highest of standards in order to ensure both her mental health and wellbeing, but also to ensure a really safe protocol in return to play."