Woman searching for twin's grave wants apology
- Published
A woman searching for her twin brother’s grave said the government should apologise for leaving families unable to grieve.
Mary Hart was born in Stourbridge in 1954 but her brother John died during the birth and his body was immediately taken by the authorities for burial.
It was common practice at the time for babies’ bodies to be either buried in mass graves or alongside a stranger who was being buried on the same day in a local cemetery.
"It is our story. What happened to him happened to us both. I’ve spent 70 years without him. I feel I deserve to know what happened, to know the truth," Ms Hart, 69, said.
The mother-of-two, from Solihull, also tried to verify information regarding her own birth but learned that her early records up to the age of 21 were lost.
In 2020, Nadine Dorries MP told the House of Commons: "Until the 1980s and 1990s, bereaved families of stillborn children were kept in the dark by doctors and midwives, ostensibly for their own protection.
"It was assumed that if a mother or father was allowed to see their stillborn baby and establish any kind of connection with it, this would only prolong and worsen their grief."
Often the records of the burials were not kept, were lost or in some cases mothers were told their child was buried with a woman when in fact they were buried in a mass grave with other babies.
In some cases fathers were asked to take their stillborn children for burial in a cardboard box tied up with string.
"It’s the lies told that are hard to live with and to find out there is no record of the baby you carried and lost after nine precious months is a travesty," Ms Hart said.
"I do think it is vital for mothers still alive to know the truth."
Ms Hart's brother was taken to an undertaker in Stourbridge after he died.
The family was told John had been buried with a woman in the town.
"I was so angry at him leaving me to face the traumas of life as his little sister. He was the one who should have survived," Ms Hart added.
Neither the undertaker or Dudley Council was able to find any records of the burial.
Stuart Connelly, head of bereavement services with the local authority, said it was an "extremely sad and tragic situation" and they would do everything they could to help.
“Our records do date back to the 1950s but unfortunately we have no record of this burial at Stourbridge cemetery from the information we have," he said.
Calls for apology
Ms Hart said she had found support with a voluntary support group, The Lost Twin Network and from campaigner Gina Jacobs from Wirral in Liverpool who had discovered mass graves containing up to 90 children.
Mrs Jacobs' case was raised on 1 May in the House of Commons by Wirral MP Margaret Greenwood who asked Rishi Sunak if the government would apologise on behalf of previous governments.
The prime minister did not apologise but paid tribute to Mrs Jacobs who he said "deserves nothing but our praise and admiration and I’m so pleased she’s brought comfort to so many other people too."
This news was gathered by the Local Democracy Reporting Service which covers councils and other public service organisations.
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