Don't think it works like that Ralph...although... 

For those that missed it Real Madrid trashed Rayo Vallecano 10-2 earlier and you can read Emlyn Begley's report here.

Carl Jenkinson, seconds after coming on, gets a yellow card for dissent after a disagreement over a throw-in.

It's been that sort of game.

James Collins, the best player on the pitch today, meets a West Ham corner but it spins over.

The type of season this is so far, West Ham will probably nick this.

James Tomkins has just come close. His shot was heading for the bottom corner before a Swansea boot got in the way.

The Hammers bring on Carl Jenkinson for Michail Antonio.

John Hartson
Former Wales striker on 5 live

Image source, Rex Features

"James Collins has been a absolute rock for West Ham - he's made tackles and thrown himself in front of everything.

"He's a little bit lucky though not to have conceded a penalty - people will argue about it when they see the incident but it does hit his hand."

Andre Ayew makes way for Swansea. On comes Modou Barrow.

Ian in Swansea: Gomis? Offside? Shurely some mistake #atleast10timeseverygame

Tweet using #bbcfootball,, external or text on 81111 (UK only and please include a name). 

James Collins heads a Swansea corner clear, and then he's straight back up to charge down a shot.

He's been good today has the Welshman (despite his hoodwinkery earlier).

Image source, Getty Images

But if you look away now Jason there will definitely be a cracking finale.

'Definitely'

Great chance for Swansea. Bafetimbi Gomis chases Jonjo Shelvey's long ball (yes, he was onside). Adrian gets there first but his clearance falls to Gylfi Sigurdsson 20 yards out. With Adrian stranded, he should have hit the target, but instead hits a defender.

Sustained Hammers pressure now. Angelo Ogbonna, up for a corner, sees his shot deflect wide.

Image source, Getty Images

That's twice in quick succession the striker has strayed behind the West Ham defensive line.

But this is a good effort. It's for West Ham.

Enner Valencia cuts in from the left and his right-foot shot is tipped over by Lukasz Fabianski.

Swansea work it from left to right and Gylfi Sigurdsson nudges it to Kyle Naughton, who runs up to the ball like a man whop is about to spank it wide from 25 yards.

Guess what happens...

John Hartson
Former Wales striker on 5 live

"It was a good move from West Ham, Cresswell does well down the left-hand side and looks to whip it in but puts it straight into Fabianski's hands."

West Ham take off Alex Song and bring on Pedro Obiang.

Swansea replace Jack Cork with Jonjo Shelvey.

Image source, Reuters

A rare West Ham attack and it's nicely worked. Alex Song puts Aaron Cresswell away down the left. It's a good, low cross that Lukasz Fabianski claims ahead of Michail Antonio. The keeper gets clattered for his trouble.

Elliott: I'd quite like a few West Ham wins for Christmas, but if the game is as boring as you reckon I'll be stuck wishing for (Carlton) Coal

Geddit?

I have more scouting notes on Bafetimbi Gomis. He's offside. A lot. I mean, like nearly all the time.

The debate about possession football hots up into a rant...

Nick in Burnley: You can't say It was just tiki taka that won Spain and barca everything, it was the quality of players, Barcelona of new prove that with they're exciting borderline counter attacking football , it's the same high quality players that are achieving the end result. Tiki taka has proved to be self pressurising as it causes frustration to the fans when other teams are smart and play compact. Rant over.